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Is there such thing as healthy use of erotica within a marriage?

Answered by: Todd Creager

The other day my daughter was on her Facebook account and I happened to catch a glimpse of her screen. Her friend had commented, "I am still a virgin because I have only had oral sex. " I did not know what to say. I wasn't sure if my daughter was talking about having sex or being a virgin. I did not say anything because I did not want her to know I looked at her computer. But now I am not sure if I should or how to talk with her about it or, if so, how to begin the conversation. Please help.

Answered by: Vanessa Van Petten

My wife just found out that I have been viewing pornography for the past six years of our marriage. She is furious. I feel bad, but I don't understand why she is so upset. She hasn't been sexually open to new things and I have felt that she didn't care if I took care of things myself. I don't know how to respond to her. I actually enjoy viewing pornography, but I don't want to ruin my relationship with my wife. She told me that my viewing pornography is like cheating on her. I don't get that at all. How could viewing pornography be like cheating? Is there something that I can do to help her calm down? The other question I have is about stopping pornography. I only view once or twice a week when she isn't around. I am not sure I want to stop, but I don't want a divorce either. Please advise.

Answered by: Geoff Steurer

For whatever reason, my wife has had a sudden increase in her sex drive. She is like an 18 year old boy, thinking about sex every 30 seconds. It's not a problem as much as a curiosity. We have been married for 25 years and all these years I have been more interested in sex that she has, but she has always been willing. Now she is the aggressor and wants sex once a day instead of our typical once a week (not that we do it that often). My question is why? The doctor says she is nowhere near being pre-menopausal and she 10 years beyond the typical sexual peak for women, so what is it?

Answered by: Ms. Betsy Sansby

My wife has gained about ten pounds since we were married and is no longer attractive to me. I want her to lose the weight. she starts-then eats more. How can I get her to lose weight so I can be attracted to her again?

Answered by: Susan Adams

My husband had an affair ten years ago. Our marriage survived it--we do well--but now when we make love, my husband doesn't look at me. What is going on? Is he still thinking about HER?

Answered by: Todd Creager

My husband and I are going through a nightmare of infertility. Our sex has become mechanical, on demand when the time is right. I fear we will never recover our intimacy. I desperately want a child but not at the expense of the marriage. I hate seeing other women with babies. My husband is tired of my depression and the hormones add to it. Is this worth it?

Answered by: Susan Adams

My boyfriend doesn't trust me. I've cheated on him before-twice-now am being faithful and keep getting the third degree. I want to leave him but I love him and don't want to make a mistake. He's the first nice guy I have dated.

Answered by: Susan Adams

I've been with my girl friend for 17 years with many ups and downs. Four years ago I was babysitting the kids one night when she brought two male workmates home. It was late and I was sleeping, but when I awoke she was lying on the floor with one of them. She had on a teeny dress that left little to the imagination. I told her workmates to leave and it has caused arguments for years. Recently we let the skeletons out of the closet. I told her I had slept with other women and she told me she slept with another man - the same guy she was laying on the floor with that night. They both denied anything happened that night and said it had happened at a previous time. In your opinion, am I being lied to?

Answered by: Susan Adams

I'm tired of feeling like sex is just an act to satisfy my partner. How can we make it a jointly beneficial to both of us?

Answered by: Brett Williams